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Encouraging children to be active contributors in your family

Are you raising a helpful child? There is absolutely NO doubt about it…children love to feel useful and help out around the family home!

They see us working and they want to be like us, They also love to be wherever we are, doing whatever we are doing. They are constantly craving positive connection, and there are many ways we can nurture this natural tendency.

Getting children to become active contributors in their own household is actually very important, as you are teaching them life skills and self management at a young age.

Helping children to understand that families all contribute to keeping their home tidy and doing jobs around the house, also fosters a positive team atmosphere and a willingness to all be supportive of each other.

Teaching children these important skills can start at a very young age. In actual fact – the younger the better!

There are many things that young children can do around the house to be active contributors, and encouraging it right from the start lays a positive foundation for years to come.

And in my home – my children will NEVER get paid to do jobs round the house – because they live here too – so my expectation is that they contribute at an age appropriate level.

My two year old brings his laundry basket to the washing machine.

My 4.5 year old makes her bed and tidies her room.

Together we make sure the toy area in our lounge room is packed up at the end of each day before bedtime.

My kids love to help out in the garden…sweep up the leaves and water the plants…and themselves I might add – but that is all part of the fun!

They feed the dog every night.Image result for kids helping around the house

There are so many ways that we can include our children and encourage them to be involved with jobs around the house – and they shouldn’t need to be rewarded for it. When we reward or pay children to do jobs they then have the choice to opt out and not get paid. Placing a monetary value on jobs can also lead to children simply asking “How much will you pay me?”

We want our children to be intrinsically motivated to help out – because they care about their home, their environment, their belongings and their family.

Sometimes my daughter will lead me down to her room saying that she has a surprise for me. When I open my eyes she has cleaned her entire room and displayed all her teddies up on her bed. She is beaming and bursting with excitement over what she has done all by herself, and none of it was prompted or directed by an adult. She was intrinsically motivated  to do it as it made her feel proud and happy.

As parents that is part of our job – to teach, to inspire, to motivate and encourage positive behaviour choices in all aspects of family life and day to day living.  We are teaching our children to place value and importance on the things they have, and to develop a respect for the home in which they live in.

Nothing could be more important than that.


Love Chrissie xx

“Empowering families to create the perfect mix of chaos & love”



Chrissie Davies

About Chrissie Davies

Chrissie Davies is an educator, consultant, published writer, loving adoptive mama, and passionate advocate for understanding children with challenging behaviours.

Through her consultancy Chaos to Calm, Chrissie specialises in creating understandings and strategies to meet the needs of children with challenging behaviours.

She supports both families and teachers to create more awareness of the different ways to use communication and emotional engagement to make positive changes in children’s behaviour.

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